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Jenna Jameson and “The Four Hour Work Week”

May 18, 2009


Dear Timothy,

Or should I say Yoda (LOL)!

We haven’t met but from reading your book, “The Four Hour Work Week”, I feel we have a spiritual connection that is bigger than the confines of my humble office cubicle. My co-workers are a little freaked out by the giant poster of you playing Irish Hurling that I’ve put up in the staff canteen and our inside-sales rep says I have a man-crush on you but I guess not everyone can be a lifestyles entrepreneur.

I’ve been trying my best to follow your sagely advice and think I am making real progress. Every morning I consume twice the recommended dose of your patented BrainQUICKEN nurtional formula and I find it really pumps me up (though I’m not sure if the gaseous side effects are normal).

I haven’t been able to quit my day job just yet but I’m getting there. I tried not reading email like you suggested in the book but had to abort the plan on my first day after my boss threatened to fire me by 11:30 am. He is totally uncool and trapped in the office life prison (though he does drive a nice BMW and I’m pretty certain he scored with that college intern last summer). However, for the 110 minutes when I was email free, it was totally cool though I wasn’t really sure what to do with the extra time as my job mostly involves responding to customer complaints via email.

I also took your advice and hired a virtual assistant in India to experience the empowerment of delegation. It was going pretty well until I realized my PA in Bangalore was also outsourcing his life and sub-contracting my tasks to an unemployed marketing major in Seattle. Totally not cool.

So I’ve been working really hard to find my muse. After much soul searching I realized her name is Jenna Jameson. Jenna is the only thing, I mean person that I’ve been able to get really excited about (other than your book and the online lifestyle empowerment community that you’ve built).

I’ve spent a lot of time researching Miss Jameson and consider myself a certified Jenna Genius! My plan is to create an educational DVD that walks guys like us through the basics of connecting with their idol from locating her home address via Social Security records to mapping where she hangs out in private. Like you suggested, I plan to charge $60 to reflect the premium nature of my product and to offer a 120% money back guarantee.

Once my automatic cash flow kicks in, I’m pumped about the big Quit Day and finally giving up the 9-5 office habit. I used to think achievement was all about who had the most money but now I realize it’s all about who has the longest, most exotic vacation.

After all the success I’m destined to experience through the “Four Hour Work Week”, I think it’s totally important to give something back. Originally I was going to help poor people who live in my neighborhood but they don’t seem very grateful and Northern New Jersey doesn’t look like the best place for my journey of self discovery. Right now, I’m trying to decide whether a house building project in Rio De Janeiro or well drilling program in Cape Town is better for me (I saw City of God over the weekend which was totally cool but I’m not sure if I could dig Latin chicks for six months and the beaches look better in South Africa).

Anyway I have to go, if you want to get in touch you can reach me on my landline but you might need to leave a message as I only check my voicemail once a week.

Your biggest fan
The Closer

One Comment leave one →
  1. May 22, 2009 12:06 am

    Well played. 😉

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